Until My Dying Breath
by can08writer
Summary: Rick and Michonne go on a run together to get some alone time, until something goes horribly wrong, putting one of their lives in danger. A Richonne story.
1. Chapter 1

"This is the place" Rick said, pulling into the parking lot of a store front pharmacy. "It doesn't look like anyone has been through here since the end. I'm sure it's full of useful things". Michonne nodded her head, looking off into the distance lost in her thoughts. It was the first time they had gone on a run, just the two of them, since their new budding relationship. She had been looking forward to this all week. Mostly because they finally got away from everyone else, and they were completely alone.

Rick looked over at her and seemed to read her mind. He reached over and put his hand on top of her hand which was resting on her thigh, snapping her out of her reveries. She looked over into his eyes and she saw that he was smiling at her. She smiled back. "I brought a few things... for us... a surprise." he said cryptically. She didn't know what he meant, but she was going to go with it. He leaned across the seat towards her and she leaned towards him to meet him halfway. He kissed her tenderly, rubbing his tongue against her lips until she opened them to let his tongue in. She tongued him back, circling around the inside of his mouth.

She tasted so good, he wanted more and more. He realized that if he didn't stop right now they'd never make it out of the car. Taking all the willpower he could muster, Rick pulled his head back, causing Michonne to pop her eyes open looking confused.

He smiled again to reassure her. "Not here" he said. She nodded again, and the two of them opened the car doors and got out. Rick popped the trunk and pulled out a duffel bag. Michonne noticed, and looked at him suspiciously, but didn't say anything. He grabbed her hand, and the two of them walked towards the store.

When they reached the door they dropped hands, Rick pulling out his machete, Michonne her katana. They didn't have to say a word to each other, they had been working as a well coordinated team for what seemed like years. Most of the time they communicated by simple looks and gestures. As they entered the building Rick took the right as Michonne took the left. They circled the aisles looking for walkers that had gotten inside. After they cleared the store, the two wordlessly searched for medical supplies. Michonne stuffed gauze, tylenol, and cough syrup into her bag. She could hear Rick on the other side of the store collecting supplies.

"Found a wheel chair and some canes over here" Rick called. "That's gonna come in handy in a good 30 years".

Michonne snickered. "More like 20 for you old man". She could hear him chuckle from across the store.

"You think we'll get to retire when we're old? Just sit back in our rocking chairs and let the young bucks go out here?" Rick asked.

Michonne never thought about that. She never figured she'd survive long enough to get old. But the thought of her and Rick with gray hair, babysitting Carl and Judith's babies made her smile.

"I don't know" she answered "but I hope so".

They were quiet for a while longer, each in their own thoughts again. Suddenly Rick chuckled. "Oh boy, I found the jackpot".

Michonne made her way over to him. He turned towards her and held up a mega box of condoms, there had to be at least 50. Her eyes widened and then she laughed, a hearty laugh that showed all her teeth and closed her eyes. Rick just gazed at her in wonder, she looked so beautiful when she laughed.

"If we bring this back to Alexandria we'll be heroes" she chuckled.

Rick looked at her lustily. "Maybe" he said "but I'm selfish". He stepped forward, staring into Michonne's eyes in the way he'd been doing since they first met. She felt a heat in her body whenever he looked at her like that, she could feel her body clench in response to his eyes. He got as close to her as he could, but he didn't touch her. His face was centimeters from hers, but he just stared.

The wait was driving her insane. _What was he waiting for?_

He put his two hands on hers gently, and then slowly moved his hands up her arms towards her shoulders. He was moving so slowly he sent shivers down her spine, and her skin was full of goosebumps. He was still staring into her eyes, and the way he was looking made her believe he could see her soul.

When his hands got to her shoulders he then moved them quickly to the back of her neck, grasping her head in his hands. She stared at him in wonder with a slight smile on her lips, her eyes flicking back and forth, gazing into his, waiting for whatever he had planned next. She was totally giving herself to him, and it drove him wild.

He slowly let go of her neck and stepped back. Her smile dropped and she looked confused. He smiled at her, reassuring her.

"Not like this" he said, looking around the dirty store full of dust and rot. "You deserve better than this". He pulled her over to the pharmacy counter, lifting her up and setting her on top of it like a child. "Close your eyes, I have a surprise for you. It'll take a few minutes."

Michonne gave him a skeptical look. "What kind of surprise?" she asked. "Well if I told you, that'd defeat the purpose" he laughed. She breathed out a sigh and dutifully closed her eyes.

She could hear him walk away from her and unzip the duffel bag he'd brought. She could feel a gust of wind as if something had been flapped in the room. She could hear the clanking of glass, and the scraping of something being moved across the floor.

What is this man doing? She had no idea, but waiting for him was exciting her. She heard some more shuffling and moving of objects as he arranged... something.

The longer Michonne waited the more aroused she became. She was so ready to spend some serious alone time with Rick. With the two of them being out here by themselves they could be as loud and raunchy as they wanted without worrying about waking the kids. And she intended to be loud today.

Rick suddenly lifted her off the counter, startling her, and he gently put her on the floor. Her eyes flew open and she gasped in surprise. He had spread a padded blanket on the floor. He had bordered the blanket with candles that were flickering and casting a warm light around the pharmacy floor. In the middle of the blanket was a picnic basket with a bottle of wine and two glasses. There were two pillows on the blanket so they had something soft to sit on instead of the hard floor.

She looked at Rick and he was staring into her eyes again, trying to gauge her reaction. She smiled at him "It's great" she said "how'd you learn to be so sweet?". "Lots of practice... and movies" he said, winking at her. He grabbed her hand and led her over to the blanket where they both removed their dirty shoes, and sat on the pillows.

He opened the bottle of wine and poured them both a glass. "Where'd you find the wine?" Michonne asked. "I snagged it on a run last week. I had to sneak it into my bag because I was with Daryl. You know how he hordes alcohol and cigarettes."

Michonne laughed. "Well you did well Rick. I'm very impressed with your sweet side." They both sipped their wine. He then reached into the picnic basket and pulled out two peaches. "I know this isn't exactly a four course meal, but it was pretty much all I could manage to snag without drawing too much attention". She smiled and grabbed his hand. "It's perfect".

Michonne grabbed one of the peaches and slowly brought it to her mouth. Rick was watching her like a starving dog watching a steak, and she loved it. She stuck out her tongue, gently licking the side of the peach. Rick bit his lip as he watched her. She looked into Rick's eyes and slowly bit into the peach. It was juicy and she purposely let the sticky juices flow down the side of her mouth. Some of the juice dripped down her neck and onto her chest.

She seductively batted her eyes at Rick and said "Hmmm... I don't have a napkin. Can you clean that up for me?" Rick practically leaped on top of her, licking her lips, the side of her cheeks, down her neck, and between her breasts hungrily. She moaned with pleasure at how hungry he was for her.

When Rick licked all the peach juice off of her he moved back up to her face and looked in her eyes again. "Michonne. I love you." he whispered. Her eyes opened wide. They had only had a sexual relationship for a week now, although they had basically been living as a couple for almost a year. They had both pretended that they were just friends, co-parenting his children, and co-leading their group of survivors. But at night, as she laid in her bed alone, he was all she could think about. She knew she loved him for a while, and she knew he loved her too, but they had never verbally said it, it was just implied through their actions.

As she was thinking, she noticed his eyes were boring into hers again. He looked uncertain as if he'd thought he said the wrong thing. She grabbed his face with both hands and pulled his head down into a slow, passionate kiss. She tried to let her lips speak for her, as she still couldn't tell him how she felt for some reason. He didn't seem to mind, kissing her back, and allowing his full body to press against hers.

The heat of him laying on top of her was almost too much. She opened her legs so that he could lay in closer to her, and she began to grind into him.

"Mmmmmm" he let out a low groan. She could feel him thrusting his hardness into her through both of their jeans. She was ready, she wanted him now.

She snaked her hands between them and felt for his belt buckle trying to unbuckle it, but between his regular belt and his gun belt, she couldn't get much done. He laughed and stopped kissing her for a moment. "Having some trouble?" he whispered playfully. "Shut up and help me" she moaned. He quickly obliged, lifting himself off of her and removing his gun belt, unbuckling his belt, and pulling his pants down. While he was doing that, she unbuckled her own jeans, and shimmied them down her legs to her ankles. He reached down to pull the jeans off of her ankles freeing her from them, and then he kicked his own jeans off.

She grabbed his neck again and pulled him into another kiss, this one a little more frantic. His groin was now pressed up against hers with only a thin layer of fabric from his boxers and her panties to separate them.

"You ready?" he asked her, repeating the phrase she usually said to him when they were about to do something big. She laughed "That's my line. But yes, I am _so_ ready." He looked at her mischievously. "Let me see..." He lifted his body off of her before she could do anything, and quickly moved his head between her legs, moving her panties to the side, and sticking his tongue into her to taste her. "Ahhhh!" she jumped, taken off guard. He held her hips still with his arms and continued to lick her causing her to involuntarily buck against him and arch her back lifting off the blanket. "Mmmmmm" he moaned, causing more vibration to her lower regions and making her squirm and shake. "Rick... uhhhmmm... you're not... playing... fair" she panted, barely able to speak.

"But you love it Mmmmmmmichonne" he whispered between her legs, using the M in her name to make her squirm. He was right, she did love it, he knew she did. She laid back and put her elbows on the blanket as she watched him moving his tongue between her legs, kissing her lips like it was her face. She could feel an orgasm coming, her eyes were starting to water and she involuntarily squeezed her eyes tight.

"Rick I want you" she moaned. He stopped kissing her, he knew she was on the verge and he wanted her to come while he was inside her. He moved back up her body and looked into her eyes again. "Beg" he demanded wickedly. He knew it turned her on when he was bossy in the bedroom.

"Please... please Rick, fuck me now" she begged softly. He smiled, kissing her cheek. He quickly pulled her panties off, put on one of the condoms from the box he'd found, and slowly entered her. The sensation of him being inside her nearly made her come right there and then. His eyes rolled up in his head and a low moan escaped his throat. "Damn!" was all he managed to say. She wrapped her legs around his waist and that was all the encouragement he needed. He started to thrust into her in earnest as if he were waiting his whole life for this moment.

"Ahhh... unhh... Michonne... yessssss..." he groaned as he thrust into her. Her back was arched completely, trying to allow him to dive deeper into her. She felt free and she took the opportunity to moan as loudly as she could. "Yes Rick... yesss... fuck me please" she was practically screaming. He had never heard her yell so loud and it was making him lose it. He wouldn't be able to last much longer. She could tell he was about to lose it, and so was she.

She bit into his shoulder hard, and that was the last straw. They came together practically at the same time, holding onto each other tight as spasms wracked their bodies. As they came back down, he continued to slowly thrust into her, massaging her insides until they were done spasming.

Both of them were spent. He rolled off of her and the two of them laid on the blanket together gasping for air. When he had caught his breath, he pulled the blanket over both of them and they laid snuggled together and warm.

"We can't stay here forever" Rick mumbled sleepily 20 minutes later. His words startled her, she had begun to drift off to sleep. She was so comfortable, and safe, and warm she didn't want to face the outside world again. "Why not?" she moaned playfully, turning around to face him. "Hmmm..." he said, making a face as if he were thinking hard. "Well, we do have other responsibilities. Kids... and a town to run... and an infirmary to stock..." he said smirking. She tried her hardest to recreate the pout he always made when he wanted something badly and she muttered "Okay fine".

She flipped the blanket off of both of them, and slowly got up to put her underwear and pants back on. He groaned as he got up to do the same. As they got dressed, he couldn't help but check her out again. He couldn't believe that after so long this woman was finally his, he could touch her, and kiss her, and make love to her whenever he wanted. He smiled to himself as he pulled up his pants.

She glanced over at him and noticed him smiling. "What's so funny?" she asked. "I'm just thinking about how lucky I am" he smirked. She smiled too. "You're adorable Grimes" she replied.

The two of them cleaned up the blanket, wine, and candles, and they shared the second peach, licking juice off each other's fingers.

"Okay, let's hit the road. We should get back right before dark if we leave now" Rick said. As Michonne opened the door, Rick reached out and patted Michonne on the butt causing her to turn around. Suddenly a walker reached through the door, grabbing her arm and biting through her shoulder.


	2. Chapter 2

"Noooooo!" Rick screamed, fumbling for his machete. Michonne tried to rip her shoulder out of the walker's mouth, causing her to scream in agony, but it wouldn't let go. Rick finally got the machete out of his belt and slammed it through the walker's skull, causing it to fall to the ground.

Rick knelt down over Michonne, his whole body shaking. He didn't know what to do.

 _She's bit, she's bit, oh my God she's bit._

Michonne was sitting on the floor holding her left shoulder with her right hand in disbelief. She moved her hand and stared at the blood covering it. She was in shock.

"We... we have to cut it off" Rick said trembling. He moved to take off his belt to wrap around her arm.

Michonne slowly came out of her shock induced stupor to mumble "It's my shoulder, you can't... it won't work..."

"We have to!" Rick yelled. He started wrapping the belt around her arm in a panic.

"Rick stop it!" she yelled back "It won't work!". And suddenly it hit her like a wave.

 _It won't work. I'm going to die._

Tears poured down her face as the reality of her situation set in.

"We have to get you back to Alexandria, maybe... maybe something can be done" he said, reaching down to pick her up off the floor.

Her head was spinning. _It's no use, I'm going to die, It's over._

She allowed him to pick her up and gently place her in the passenger side of the car. He gave her the blanket to hold to her wound as he started the car and sped off down the road.

"We can get back, Denise will know what to do, she can amputate so that your shoulder can be taken out too. She... She took care of Carl's eye... she knows how to do these things". Rick was talking more for his own sake than Michonne's. She was in shock and was barely registering what he was saying.

He kept talking, but Michonne couldn't hear him anymore.

 _I'm going to die. I'm going to turn into one of them. I can't... I can't be one of them. Oh God, no. Please no._

"Kill me" she whispered so softly that Rick couldn't hear her. He was still rambling nervously, his hands that were gripped around the steering wheel were shaking badly.

"Kill me" she said a little louder. Rick heard her this time and turned to look at her, not believing what she just said.

"Michonne, you're going to be ok" Rick said, trying to stay confident "Denise can help you, she can save you".

"No" she said, turning her head to look at Rick "Rick she can't save me. It's too late, the bite is too high. Please, promise me you won't let me turn into them..." she said, tears streaming down her face "Please... it's my worst fear".

"I'm not killing you and you're not dying Michonne" Rick yelled "We're gonna get home. Just hold on." As he sped down the street he held on to her thigh, rubbing it, trying to comfort her.

Michonne was beyond being comforted. She had seen this happen too many times, to too many people she loved. No one ever survived a shoulder wound. She pressed the blanket to her shoulder knowing that it would do no good.

 _It might be better to just bleed out then to deal with the burning fever. The hallucinations. The pain as the infection takes over your body._

Michonne stopped pressing the blanket on her arm. She closed her eyes in defeat.

Rick glanced over and saw her. "Michonne, keep pressing, you have to stop the bleeding" he demanded.

"The blanket won't stop the bleeding" she sighed "It's over Rick".

"No! It's not fucking over!" he screamed "I can't lose you. Please. I just... I just got you. Michonne please fight, please. We can get back."

"It took us an hour to get here. By the time we get back it will be too late for an amputation. The infection is already spreading" she explained quietly.

Rick looked over at her again and realized she had given up. He had never seen her surrender before, she was the strongest person he knew, and she was giving up.

"Please" he begged her "Please do this for me, I can't handle this. I can't just watch you die. I need you to fight".

She realized that Rick needed her to fight, for his sake. Even though she knew it was useless. She loved him and she would do what he needed.

"Ok Rick" she said softly, pressing the blanket to her wound again.

The two of them were quiet for a while. Michonne's thoughts took advantage of the silence.

 _So this is the last day of your life. Well... it started out great. At least you get to die next to Rick. Maybe we'll even get back to Alexandria in time to say goodbye to Carl and Judith and the rest of the family. It won't be so bad if you get to say goodbye... It wont be so bad._

"Michonne, how are you doing?" Rick asked. She ignored the question.

"Rick, what's your favorite color?" she asked. Rick was so thrown off by the question he turned to look at her temporarily, not watching the road.

"Why are you asking me that Michonne?"

"Because I don't know the answer" she responded. He looked conflicted as if he didn't know if he should answer her or not.

"Are you asking me because you think you're dying?"

"I'm asking because I don't know the little things about you. I never got to know. And I want to".

He paused. "Before I met you my favorite color was red. But since I met you it's changed to blue, because I know you like when I wear my blue shirts, and making you happy makes me happy".

She managed a smile. "Before I met you I liked orange. But it changed to blue because I love your eyes" He looked at her smile and he smiled too.

"When did you first know you loved me?" she asked. He looked back at her, surprised by the question she was asking him. In all the time they'd known each other, they'd never asked questions this intimate.

"I... I've loved you for a long time. But I first realized it when we were on the road to terminus, and you made that bet with Carl on the railroad tracks, and you shared that candy bar with him. I saw how much he adored you, and I realized I adored you too." She nodded.

"Me too..." she started "I... I realized it after you saved me and Carl from those men Daryl was with. I saw how you would do anything to protect me and Carl, and I... I realized..." she trailed off.

Rick turned to look at her again. "You realized what?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"I loved you. I... I love you Rick" It was the first time she said it out loud.

He reached over and rubbed her thigh again.

"Rick" she called. "Yes baby?" he asked. "Will you be ok without me?". The vulnerability in her voice made him burst into tears.

"No" he said "No. I won't be ok. Carl and Judith won't be ok. We _need_ you Michonne. We _love_ you. There's so much we haven't done, so much we haven't gotten to say. I need you to survive this".

"And what if I can't?" she said, crying now.

"You will. I know you will" he said, but he didn't believe his own words. She could read him too well, she knew _he_ didn't believe those words either.

"Rick. There was a time when I wanted to die. I had a son, he was three years old, and he and his father died when walkers overran the camp we were in. After that I was alone, without my baby. Without anyone. I didn't know if anyone else was left in the world. I didn't see another human being for months before I met Andrea. So many times I wanted to just die, I wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. But I was afraid that if I died I'd turn into a walker. That fear kept me from killing myself". Rick listened in shock. He had no idea how much about her he didn't know.

"I don't want to die. I want to live, that's why I found you and Carl after the prison fell. I wanted to live life as long as I could. But now I don't have a choice. The only choice I have now is how I die. If we can get back to Alexandria I want to say good bye to everyone, and then I want to go, before the fever kills me. I want to die in your arms Rick, with you holding me. And then I'll be ok. I'll be with my son Andre."

Rick was sobbing so hard behind the wheel he had to stop the car. He turned to her and kissed her gently on the lips. "Ok... Ok honey... If we can't do anything, I'll do that for you. Just please hold on... for me". She nodded.

He continued driving.

As she sat in the passenger's seat she could feel her shoulder throbbing more and more. They had been driving for about 25 minutes and she knew she was losing a lot of blood, and the blanket wasn't doing anything about it. She started to feel dizzy, and hot. "Rick" she said weakly "I think... gonna... pass out". He snapped his head towards her and said "breathe honey, you gotta breathe in some more oxygen". Michonne took a deep breath and then passed out.

When she woke up, she didn't understand what was going on. The car wasn't moving anymore. She was now laid out in the backseat, and Rick was wedged between the backseat and the front seats next to her, sobbing hysterically. She reached out and stroked his hair, causing him to look up.

"Wha... what happened?" she asked groggily. He reached out and put his hand on her head feeling her forehead briefly and then stroking her hair, but she noticed he wouldn't give her eye contact. "Rick?" she asked. He finally looked up.

"We have a flat tire" he choked out "and you have a fever."


	3. Chapter 3

_**So I was definitely crying as I wrote this chapter. Enjoy.**_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Rick looked down at Michonne in total despair. She could see it in his eyes. He knew she would die now. His expression broke her heart. She wished that she could change something, do something, to make this not happen. She reached up and ran her hand down his cheek, wiping away some of the tears that were falling.

 _As long as Rick is with me, I'll be ok._

He leaned down and rubbed his forehead against her increasingly warm one. "Baby I'm so sorry" he whispered. She reached up and ran her fingers through his curls. "You have nothing to be sorry about. It's not your fault." "I shouldn't have grabbed you, I distracted you. If I hadn't..." Michonne quickly pulled Rick's eyes to her own. "No!" she said forcefully "You're not going to sit here and blame yourself. You didn't do anything wrong. I didn't do anything wrong. It happened, and that's the way it is. I'm not going to spend my last hours listening to the man I love beat himself up over something he couldn't change". The look in her eyes made Rick stop.

"Ok" he nodded. "There's a house a little bit up the way. The sun will be setting soon, I'm gonna carry you up there".

"I can walk" she answered harshly. When she realized how harsh it sounded she softened her voice. "I'm sorry. I... let me walk while I still can".

He nodded again and helped her out the car. He put his arm around her waist as he guided her to the house. As she walked, the cool breeze felt good on her warming skin. The sun was beaming on her back. It was a beautiful day. Her thoughts wandered to Carl and Judith. She wondered what they were doing now, probably sitting outside on their porch swing, with no idea that she'd never come home to them.

As they approached the house she noticed wildflowers growing in the front yard. Someone had tied a swing to the tree in the front and the swing was rocking slightly in the breeze. The house was beautiful, it looked like it was well maintained when people had actually lived there.

Rick walked Michonne over to the tree swing. "Wait here until I clear it" he said. She sat on the swing as he pulled out his gun and went into the house. As she waited, trying to ignore the pain in her shoulder, she rocked back and forth on the swing. Soon she was flying up in the air, kicking up her legs to lift herself higher. She hadn't been on a swing in years and she forgot how good it felt to have the wind rush past her. Especially now that her fever was rising.

When Rick came back outside, the sight of her swinging on the tree swing with a smile on her face made him want to laugh and cry at the same time. As he approached her in awe she gave him a playful look and said "Push me Rick". He laughed and pushed her higher every time she swung back towards him. He pushed her for a few more minutes until she stopped laughing. She was starting to get dizzy again.

He noticed and gently stopped the swing. She reached out to him, and this time he completely lifted her in his arms and carried her into the house. The inside of the house was more beautiful than the outside. Besides the layer of dust on the surfaces, and the remains of long rotten fruit in the fruit bowl, it looked exactly as it must have before everything turned.

"It's so nice in here" Michonne murmured as Rick put her down. "I know" Rick said "this place must've cost a fortune." Michonne plopped down onto the extremely comfortable couch. "I don't know how you're feeling, but the master bathroom has a huge whirlpool tub. I turned the knob and hot water came out. They must have propane heating and a separate water system. Would you be up for taking a bath?" He asked.

She realized that that was just what she needed. Her skin was getting hotter by the minute, and she was starting to get chills, but she knew the water would calm her, and hopefully wash off some of the blood that was still soaking though her clothes. She nodded "Yes Rick, I'd like that". He propped her up on the pillows to make her more comfortable, and then left to run the bath.

As she waited, she finally let it sink in that this was probably her last night alive. She sat here in a beautiful house, about to have a bath with the man she loved more than anything, and she thought it could be worse. The only thing she regretted was never seeing her children again. Carl and Judith were as much hers as they were Rick's and she wanted to explain to them how much they meant to her. She looked over and saw a notebook and a pen that was left on the coffee table nearby. She reached out and decided she was going to write a letter to Carl.

As she took the pen and opened the book, she tried to figure out what to say. How to start. But she realized that the best thing to do was to say what was on her heart. Especially to Carl. She had to be honest with him.

 _Dear Carl,_

 _I'm sitting here on a couch in a strange house, thinking about you. As you know now, I've been bitten by a walker, and I don't have too long. We made a promise once, to always be honest with each other, so I have to admit to you that I'm scared. I'm scared for me, but I'm more scared for you, and your dad, and Judy. I don't want you guys to hurt, I don't want you to be sad, I don't want you to miss me._

 _If I could take away all the pain you're going to feel, I would do it gladly. I wish I was able to get home to you and hug you, and show you that I'll be alright, but I can't. But please know, that wherever we go when we die, if we go anywhere, I'll always be thinking about you. Always._

 _I'm not alone, I have your dad here with me. But when I'm gone, he's going to be hurting. He's going to need you to show him how to be happy again. He's going to need you Carl. He'll try to be strong, but you and I both know that inside he'll be a mess. He'll blame himself for what happened to me, but I want to tell you now, it wasn't his fault. These things happen without warning. That's why life is so precious._

 _I want to tell you that I'm so proud of the man you're becoming. You are strong, and brave, smart and kind. You are everything that I wanted Andre to be, and I feel like you're my son and my best friend. Your mom Lori would be so proud of you too._

 _I want you to have my Katana. I think if you practice you could get really good at it, and it will make you look pretty cool for Enid. Wink wink. Also, I have a stash of candy bars in the bottom of the closet in your dad's room, help yourself. And I have a confession to make, last night when we were discussing whether Spiderman or Batman would win in a fight and I said I was team Spiderman, I wasn't being completely truthful. I just wanted to make you upset. You're right, Batman would kick Spiderman's behind any day._

 _Finally, I know I don't have to tell you this, but take care of Judy. She is going to have a hard life, and she needs a great big brother like you to guide her. She loves you more than anything, I can see it in her smile when you walk into the room._

 _P.S. I love you._

 _Michonne_

As soon as Michonne put down the pen she started to sob. She had poured her heart out on to the page and her heart was breaking for her children who would lose their mother twice. She cried because it wasn't fair that after finally finding love and happiness it would end because of a walker's bite. She cried because she knew that after she died, Rick would be all alone in this house with her body, and he still had to bring her back to Alexandria. She knew he was living out his worst nightmare and she couldn't help him through it because she was living out hers as well.

Rick, hearing her cry, walked back into the room. He silently kneeled down in front of her as she sat on the couch, and hugged her around the waist, resting his head on her thighs. Her tears were falling on his cheeks and neck, but he didn't move. His tears ran down his face as well.

They stayed that way for a while, just enjoying the warmth of each other's touch. She broke the silence.

"I wrote a letter to Carl, because I can't say goodbye to him. Can you give this to him?" She asked, folding the letter and handing it to Rick.

"Of course baby" Rick said.

"Ok, I'm ready for a bath now" she said, wiping her eyes. He got up and gently pulled her up from the couch. He put his arm around her waist as he led her into the bathroom. He was right, this tub was huge. It seemed big enough for four people to fit in. Her heart swelled when she noticed that Rick had relit the candles they had used earlier in the day and surrounded the tub with them. He was trying to be sweet, even in a time like this.

Rick helped her undress, trying to avoid her wounded shoulder. "I still have Tylenol in my bag" he said "let me give it to you, it'll help with the pain, it may even bring the fever down a little". She shook her head. "Someone in Alexandria may need it more than I do". He didn't press her, he knew she didn't want to waste the medicine on herself.

He took a towel and gently wiped the excess blood off her arms, trying to avoid the actual bite which caused her serious pain when touched. He could feel her arm and her whole body was hot to the touch.

He then removed his own clothes as she patiently waited. She took the opportunity to watch his body. His chiseled chest, his flat muscular belly, his tight thighs, and then she moved back up to his face. His beautiful face. She would miss him so much.

He stepped into the tub and then reached out a hand to her. She shakily lifted her legs into the tub. He sat down first, and then slowly lowered her onto his lap, so that she was sitting between his legs with her back to him.

She exhaled and leaned back into him completely. He felt so nice, so safe. He gently cupped water over her shoulder and rubbed water down her arms. He took water and rubbed it across her forehead, trying to cool her a little. She sighed in contentment. He leaned down and kissed her neck and her good shoulder, nuzzling himself into her, smelling her, then opening his mouth and gently tasting her. He didn't want to ever forget this. Her smell, her touch, her taste.

"I know you're scared Rick" she whispered "but don't be scared. I've accepted this. I was lucky enough to get so many wonderful things at the end of the world. More than most people. The only regret I have is leaving you and the kids. But I know that you'll be ok, because you're a survivor. You'll get through this".

He rested his head on her neck. "I don't know how to get through this again. You helped me the first time. I'm a weak man. You're my strength". She grabbed both of his hands and held them. "You're not weak. You're the strongest man I know, and you can do this. Carl will help you through it, and so will Judith. And all of our family will help. That's what we do". He nodded slowly into her neck. She closed her eyes and just felt his arms around her, and him breathing into her back.

"This was one of the best days Rick. One of the best days of my life. You did well Grimes" she said, turning around to kiss him. He kissed her back hungrily, as if his life depended on her lips.

They sat in silence in the tub, holding each other, crying silently, searing this moment into each of their memories. After a while she started shivering, and she was pulled back to reality. He noticed and helped her out of the tub, getting another towel to wrap her in. He helped her dry off and then brought her a large men's dress shirt and suit pants he found in one of the closets.

She looked at the outfit skeptically. "Not the most fashionable outfit" she joked. He managed a half smile and then helped her get dressed. By now she was shaking pretty badly and sweat was forming on her forehead. He helped her to the king sized bed in the master bedroom. He pulled back the sheets so she could get underneath, then he slipped in beside her and snuggled up to her trying to keep her as warm as possible.

She was shivering as if she was freezing, but her body was so hot she was radiating heat out towards him. He lay holding her for a few minutes until he realized she had fallen asleep. He put his head on her back and listened to her heart beat.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Andre... come to mommy... Carl... get your brother" Michonne was whispering in her sleep. Rick just listened, crying hysterically. She was dreaming about Carl and Andre being brothers. He nuzzled himself into her back which was now so hot it was almost painful. He loved this woman so much he didn't know how he'd survive without her.

His movements made her stir. "Andre?" she whispered, still half asleep. "No baby, it's Rick" he cried, moving her locks from her face. "Rick" she repeated. She opened her eyes and looked at him. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, and she was sweating through the sheets. "Rick" she said again, a little more clearly "I'm ready".


	4. Chapter 4

_**This is the final chapter to this story**_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Her words broke Rick's heart. He knew she was in pain, and the end was near, but hearing her say it, and knowing what she wanted him to do, made him fall apart.

"Baby" he said, barely able to get the words out. "Are you sure? Is this what you want?". He knew the answer, he was just trying to stall for precious seconds with her.

Michonne knew he was stalling and managed a weak smile. "Yes Rick. It's ok baby. I'll be ok." Rick reluctantly got up and went over to his bag where he had a knife. Michonne followed him with her eyes.

He unzipped the bag and pulled out a hunting knife. He stalled for more time, wiping off the blade on his shirt. When he turned around to her she was watching him, and the determined look in her eye made him almost fall to the floor in grief.

He slowly walked back over to her and got back in bed with her. She turned so that they were eye to eye and he wrapped his arms around her. She gazed into his blue eyes as if she were trying to remember everything about them. He did the same to her.

"Rick, when I'm gone... you have to live... for the kids" she whispered. Unable to speak, he just nodded.

She moved in and kissed him slowly, tears mixing with the kiss making both of them taste salty. After a while she broke the kiss and grabbed his hand with the knife, staring into his eyes as she brought it up under her chin.

"I love you until my dying breath" she whispered. "I love you Michonne" he choked out. She nodded and closed her eyes. Before he lost his nerve, he thrust the knife up through her chin into her brain. He heard a quick gurgle of blood and then nothing as she died in his arms.

He let out a howl of grief as he stared down at her motionless body, still so hot that touching her was painful. He wailed in sorrow, clutching her head to his chest and rocking her back and forth like a mother with her baby. He rocked her for what seemed like hours, her blood staining his shirt red.

He cried her name over and over again until his voice was hoarse. When he had no tears left to cry anymore, he just held her in his arms until he saw the first rays of dawn.

He felt numb on the inside and outside as he finally let go of her body and got off the bed. He looked down at her and watched her face, now peaceful, no longer contorted in pain from the wound, or sweat from the fever. Right then he knew.

 _She's with Andre._

He bent down and kissed her lips again, and then wrapped her up in the sheets from the bed. He stumbled out of the house in search of a car to take her back to Alexandria.

As he walked in the cool morning air his mind went back to when she had found him and Carl, after the prison had been destroyed. She had been the first one to make Carl laugh again, to make him play games and make bets as if he were a kid once again. He needed to bring her home to Carl.

He felt his pocket where her letter was still sitting. He was tempted to open it, but he would never betray her trust. It was meant for Carl, and he would get it.

Rick walked for half an hour until he reached another house that had a garage. He looked through the garage door and saw two cars parked inside that seemed to be in pretty good condition. He opened the garage and broke out one of the car's windows so that he could get inside. He then jump started the car that still had a quarter tank of gas left, and drove it back to the house.

As he walked towards the master bedroom where Michonne's body was, he passed the bathroom where the bathtub was still full of water, and the candles that he had lit had burned themselves out. He paused, remembering their last night together, and tears threatened to come, but he pushed them down. He had a mission and he wouldn't fail her.

Rick walked into the bedroom where his love was still laying on the bed wrapped in the sheets. He lifted her carefully and carried her to the car that was waiting out front. As he passed the tree with the swing he smiled to himself and he could almost hear her say _"Push me Rick"_. He gently laid her in the backseat, before starting the car and making his way back to Alexandria.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Carl was worried. Rick and Michonne hadn't mentioned staying out overnight, and he knew they would never do that unless something went wrong. Maybe they ran into a herd of walkers, or bad people. He knew they were probably fine, if anybody knew how to handle themselves it was his father and Michonne, but he couldn't shake a feeling of dread that settled in his gut. He had taken care of Judith the night before, feeding and playing with her and then putting her to bed. He almost expected them to be home when he woke up, but they still weren't back. He made himself and Judith a breakfast of stale Cheerios and they ate in silence.

Afterwards, Carl put Judith into her stroller and decided to go for a walk around the gates. Judith loved going for walks and she happily gurgled and cooed in the stroller as Carl pushed her.

As Carl pushed Judith past the front gate, he noticed a car pulling up. "It's Rick, open the gates" Sasha called from above. Spencer pulled the gates open as the car pulled in. Carl was relieved. He pushed the stroller towards the car and immediately noticed he didn't see Michonne. Rick slowly got out the driver's side with tears running down his face and his shirt covered in blood, and he didn't need to say a word. Carl knew she was gone.

Carl let out a scream that made everyone who was outside turn towards him. Even Judith froze and looked around. He dropped to his knees and wailed. Sasha ran to him in confusion "What is it Carl? What happened?". She looked towards Rick, who was now walking around the car and opening the backseat. When Sasha saw the bundle in the back wrapped up in sheets she gasped and clutched her chest. Carl moaned "Michoooooooonne".

Rick picked up her body out of the back seat in a daze. He didn't acknowledge anyone or anything. He walked off in the direction of his home.

Rick carried Michonne into the house and laid her body on the couch. He then fell down in front of her and stared off into space.

Sasha, joined by Maggie and Glenn, escorted Carl and Judith back to their home. Glenn opened the door first, not knowing what to expect from Rick. As Glenn walked in he saw Rick slouched in front of the body of Michonne, which was on the couch. Carl walked in next, and quickly made his way to the couch. Without saying a word, he reached out and moved the sheet that was covering Michonne's face. When he saw her peaceful expression, Carl burst into tears, getting on his knees to move closer to her. He reached his hand towards her face and touched her cheek.

Rick suddenly heard Michonne's voice in his head. _Rick, when I'm gone... you have to live... for the kids._

Rick nodded his head. He reached out and touched Carl's shoulder. "She was so brave Carl. She got bit, but she fought for as long as she could. We tried to get back to you and Judith but we couldn't".

Carl just stared at Michonne's face, stroking her cheek while tears ran down. "She's still warm" he whispered. "She had a fever from the bite" Rick said.

Carl swallowed. "Did she suffer?". "No, she asked me to end it before... before it got too bad". Carl nodded his head. "I'm glad you were there, to end it for her. It's what I would do. It's what you do when you love someone". Rick stared at Carl in shock of how mature his son was. His son was a much better man than he was.

Rick remembered the letter and took it out of his pocket. "She wrote this for you" he said. Carl looked at the letter in surprise. He couldn't believe that she had time to write a letter after being bitten by a walker. Carl took the letter from his father and tucked it into the pocket of his jeans to read later.

Carl reached over and hugged his father. "I know it was hard for you. But it was what she wanted". Carl's words of reassurance broke Rick. He burst into tears, hugging Carl hard. Both of the Grimes men cried on the floor, as Sasha, Maggie and Glenn looked on heartbroken.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Carl made his way to his room and closed his door. He needed a minute to be alone. His best friend, his mom, was dead. He laid on his bed and closed his eyes, trying to understand why this happened. Why this world was so cruel that it would take away both of his mothers. He reached into his pocket and took out Michonne's letter. He wanted to read it so badly, but he was also afraid. He was trying to be brave and strong for his father's sake, but he was afraid that her letter would make him break down. She could always see right through him.

He decided to take the risk and he opened the letter. As he read, tears rolled down his face when she said she was scared, but she would always be thinking of him. Especially when she said she was proud of him, and that his mom Lori would be too. His mouth dropped open when she said he could have her katana, he knew it was her most prized possession. He laughed when she told him where her candy bar stash was and that she was a member of team Batman all along. When she told Carl to take care of Judy, he smiled. She knew how much Judy loved him, and she knew he would always take care of his little sister. When he finished reading, he felt like he had a final conversation with her. That she said her goodbyes to him, and that he could now say his goodbyes to her. He folded up the letter and held it to his heart, closed his eyes, and said "Good bye Michonne. I love you too".

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The men in Alexandria went out to dig a grave for Michonne, as the women started to cook a group meal to feed everyone after the funeral. Maggie, Sasha, and Rosita offered to help dress Michonne for the funeral, but Rick insisted on doing it himself. He knew she had hated the shirt and pants he had found for her in the house, and he certainly didn't want to bury her in that. He browsed through the closet in his room, which had become their closet, for anything that she possibly might have wanted to wear, when he pulled out a light blue sundress. He had no idea she even owned a dress, especially not a blue one. Her words popped into her head.

 _Before I met you my favorite color was orange. But it changed to blue because I love your eyes._

He knew that this was the dress. He took a wash cloth and cleaned the blood off of her neck and chest. He then carefully removed the clothes she had on, and pulled the dress on her. She looked so beautiful that he couldn't help but bend down and kiss her, but by now her skin was cold and lifeless. He found a scarf and wrapped it around her neck to hide the knife wound.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

All of Alexandria came out for her funeral. Everyone knew how important she was to Rick, plus, she had saved them all when a walker herd had broken its way into Alexandria, by encouraging them all to get behind Rick and fight the walkers in one on one combat.

Rick, Carl with Michonne's katana strapped to his back, and Judith watched as their wife, mother, friend, lover, confidant, and moral compass was laid to rest in the ground. Rick and Carl had tears silently running down their faces, but even Judith seemed to understand that there was something going on. She was abnormally quiet, and stared into the hole in the ground with concern.

Before the men began covering Michonne with dirt, Carl stopped them and took out one of the candy bars Michonne had told him about. He took the wrapper off, broke it in half, and dropped one of the halves into her grave. "We always share" he whispered, as they began filling in the hole.


End file.
